Sunday, April 8, 2007

He has Risen. He is Not Here!

Easter spells out beauty, the rare beauty of new life. -S.D. Gordon

Well, if you didn't know, today is THE day the Church celebrates the resurrection of Christ. So Happy Easter! What's so great about the Easter story is that it just makes everything else pale in significance. Why? Because it's all about Jesus. Duh.

And what better way for me to celebrate Easter then to make a new post, right? Truth be told, there are many other ways - and they're all probably infinitely better. But if you take away all those good ideas one by one, somewhere along the line will be "posting on insignificant blog." Besides, how many bloggers do you know of that are posting on their blogs today? Other than everyone on the planet, I've got to be the only one. But please, hold the accolades. There is no need to thank me, friends. The pleasure is all mine.

So anyway, I've been thinking about people's diets and what they eat. I was at Fresh Choice yesternight and was a little surprised by how well that place is doing. First of all, the meal does not include any meat whatsoever, save for the pepperoni on the pepperoni pizza and the clams in the clam chowder. Second of all, the mac and cheese has no cheese! What in the name of Steve Urkel would motivate them to serve mac and cheese without the cheese? It's like going into a fast food joint and saying "Yeah, I'll have the cheeseburger but hold the cheese." Madness, I tell you. Well, I'll give them the benefit of the doubt. After all, Jesus was a forgiving man and I can be one too... usually. Maybe they're just looking out for us lactose intolerant folks. Or maybe I just went on a bad day. Ugh.. but either way, the guy who founded Kraft Foods must be spinning in his grave!

Anywho, that's not the point I wanted to exaggerate. I just don't know why people like Fresh Choice. I think most people go because they think it's healthy and that they can't possibly gain any weight from eating there. I've got news for those people: if you eat all you can eat, you're going to gain weight. For some reason, people think salads and soups are some magical food that contain zero calories. And they eat them like they contain negative calories. The latest stat I've seen is that one third of the country is overweight. I must have saw a third of those people at Fresh Choice yesterday.

I can pinky swear with the best of them but I'm going to give away the big secret to losing weight and that is: EAT LESS, TUBBY! Why is that so hard to swallow? Pun intended. People, you don't need to give away your hard earned dollars to other people to help you lose weight. All you have to do is eat less! That or exercise more. But I hate exercise so I'd rather eat less. So If you're trying to eat less, a buffet isn't going to cut it. On the contrary, you'll be the one cutting it. And by "it," I mean "the cheese."

I saw on the news recently that TGI Friday's is serving their meals in smaller portions. Not only that, the prices have gone down to reflect the smaller serving sizes. Unfortunately, I'm not all that familiar with the restaurant chain. I've only been to Friday's a couple of times in my whole life and I'll probably go another two times the rest of my life. But I say good for them. Nobody ordering an appetizer and dessert should be eating a full rack of ribs anyway.

Having said that, you'll still probably see me at various buffets. I've got nothing against buffets. I'm just trying to look out for the little people. I guess in this case, the little people are the big people.